Did you know confidence is not innate? It is a learned ability. First and foremost, let's define confidence. According to an article on Psychology Today, confidence is "a belief in oneself, the conviction that one has the ability to meet life's challenges and to succeed—and the willingness to act accordingly. Being confident requires a realistic sense of one’s capabilities and feeling secure in that knowledge." 

The key word here is a "realistic" sense of one's capabilities. Often women have an unrealistic sense of their own capabilities. This is one of the many missions we at TARAM have taken on. We want to change that.

Why is confidence important?

If you are perceived as confident, you gain credibility, you will make a strong first impression, you can deal with pressure, and you are able to tackle personal and professional challenges. It’s seen as an attractive trait because confidence helps put others at ease.

When we see a confident person, we may be quick to assume that they were born that way. We may believe that confidence is innate, and so if we weren't born with it, we feel doomed. The great news is that confidence is not innate. It is not a fixed characteristic. It's an ability that can be acquired and improved over time. 

How Can You Improve Your Confidence?

1. Make a list of your achievements, and other things in your life that you are proud of.

Ever reflect on your life and feel like where is your life going? However, if you were to list the things you did that year, you would feel accomplished and satisfied with the year. Similarly, make a list of your achievements. Don't say "oh no I have not achieved anything" but instead try and think of small things you can be proud of. Something as simple as "I hold the door open for others" or "my coworkers love me" is good enough. If you really can't think of anything, then write down a list of things you would like to accomplish and work towards accomplishing them.  

2. Set realistic goals for yourself 

Set realistic goals for yourself and accomplish them. If you would like to lose weight, you can say "I would like to lose 10 pounds in two months," instead of "I would like to lose 10 pounds in one week" which is a little unrealistic. This is important for self confidence because if we set unrealistic goals for ourselves we will feel demotivated. This will eventually have us feeling insecure and sad. Setting realistic goals for ourselves and seeing us accomplish these simple goals will make us feel more confident in our abilities. 

3. Practice positive self-talk

Our mind can be both our best friend and our worst enemy. Negative commentary running through our minds telling us we are not good enough is one of the main reasons we may not feel confident in ourselves. Reflect on your self-talk and consider how that might be affecting your self-confidence. Treat yourself like you would your loved ones. Would you say the negative things you say about yourself to someone else? Practice looking at yourself in the mirror and talking to yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror and compliment yourself. It may feel funny, but it is vital. Spend some time practicing positive self-talk. 

4. Make time for hobbies, and try new hobbies as well 

It's important to have hobbies because they will truly give yourself a sense of who you are and what you like. If you don't have a hobby then just look for new hobbies to try. For instance, our founder recently tried archery for the first time and realized she was good at it, which instantly improved her confidence. Similarly, trying a new hobby may surprise you and have you learning something new about yourself. If you learn that you are good at a new hobby, it is a new skill that will make you more confident in yourself and your ability.